Story to Tell?

 

 

I guess within all of us are stories to tell. I've been doing some soul searching today, wondering if I have enough words to fill a 50 K + story. Is there a story within me that needs to be written? Is it creative and not the usual run of normal stories that we find daily on the bookshelves? Will I be able to write it with the emotion and dedication a good writer succeeds in doing?

 

Here at work, I have a folder I keep little nothings in. Stuff like thank you notes from customers, addresses and some other correspondence. I was looking for a letter a photo finishing company sent to me in 97, offering me a job. Not to send a delayed answer but to see if they had a website online. (I need a new source for g-paper prints).

 

In my search I came across an email that I had printed on Aug 13, 2001. It was from Robert--the soldier I so dearly loved. I don't remember stuffing it in the folder. And seeing it sent a wave of sadness over me. Here I thought I was okay, especially after taking that silly quiz.  I realize that there are some loves I won't ever truly forget.

 

In this email, he express his fears of the future...of what would happen to us down the road...how he was afraid of loving me, afraid that he would end up as just another character in one of my stories.

 

A character in one of my stories... how sad to think that...to fear that. I remember fervently reassuring him that he would never be 'another' character in a story. That he was more than that... and he was! I think he's the last man I've ever really totally unconditionally loved... but time has a way of mending loss--even if we think we can never get over loving someone...in many ways we do, though we refuse to believe it. We somehow bury the pain and continue to live.

 

Now as time has softened the blow of his departure...I can't promise that he won't end up as a character in one of my stories. He just may. If I had of known then, that maybe he would, I would have reassured him that yes, he will end up as a character but not to worry...I put a lot of time and love into my writing and he should be honored that I would put him on such a revered plane.