When Strangers Meet
I bumped into an old lover this morning at the bank. We both were so surprised to see each other that neither of us spoke for a few moments...just stood and stared.
Then he said, "Sherrie" in a very quiet voice but to me it spoke in volumes.
I said hi and asked about his family--he's divorced with two sons who are in college now. Vern has always been a proud father and spoke for a few moments on how each of the guys were doing. I asked if his home got hit over the weekend--he's from the Charleston SC area and he said that he had a lot of trees down and his power was out for a few days. The reason he was in the area was to borrow some equipment from his uncle to move the trees from his yard.
What do you say when you really want to say what's on your mind? I met him at a Chamber of Commerce Affair. We clicked immediately and he gave me his card and asked that I call him. I had just broken up with Al and really didn't want a heavy relationship. I knew that this guy traveled around Ga, SC, NC and Va, so he wouldn't be at my door everyday. And we had fun.
But his problem was that he was a worrier about tomorrow. I had learned the hard way that tomorrow is never what we hope it will be. So why bother with worry--enjoy today. On our first date, after dinner we stopped at his apartment and we were laughing. Suddenly he said, "dammit, I knew this would happen. I knew I would like you too much. Now what am I going to do!!!!! I've got sons who are at that fun age--teenagers who are active and love golf and skiing like I do. Now, I'll be thinking of you when I'm with them. Dammit! Why do you have to be so cool? Why can't you be like the normal women around here? BORING! Fuck, Sherrie...what am I going to do?"
I remember staring at him, sitting on the floor across from me. I was sitting in a chair, legs crossed with the slit of my sundress showing more leg that I would have dared in church. I was swirling my glass of wine as I listened. His speech sent me into a Scorpio rage...I set the glass down, uncrossed my legs and leaned forward and said "See...that's the problem with people like you. You worry about tomorrow when its this moment that needs attention. Damn, I hear it all the time from my friends when they're on that first date with a fun guy...they're thinking what if we start dating steady, will my family like him, will I have to quit my job if we get married, where will we live--his house or mine... Would you please for just this night not think of what's going to happen when its over...would you please..." he interrupted me with a kiss. And for a while, he tried to do that... think of the now when we were together.
I know I had a heart to heal but I wasn't unrealistic in my expectations of him--he wasn't going to heal my heart--time would. For a while... we had fun. We laughed and sipped wine, talking about silly things. We embraced under candlelight ... and I could forget Al for a while...I could forget my loss of child and I could enjoy the arms of a man whose passions reveled mine.
But one day I got an email from him... his company was in trouble and his job wasn't secure, but he missed me and soon ...he would see me. But he didn't. A week later, his apartment was emptied and his email address (under his company name)... deleted.
As I stood in the here and now... I knew that too much time had passed. So I said "Well, take care" and turned to leave. He said, "Sherrie ...wait."
I turned wondering what he was going to say...was he going to explain his sudden silence and the fact he moved without a good-by in early 2000. Was he going to explain the years away...knowing that he came to Lumberton once a month and never bothered to at least say hi!!!
He reached over and tied a ribbon on the sleeve of my peasant blouse that was untied. I had planned on stopping by the bakery for coffee asking Miss Gail to tie it for me. His fingers trembled and I felt him brush my arm with them, as he tied the white ribbon. His familiarity was almost an ache, not one of regret but one of long forgotten pain.
When he finished, he surveyed his handiwork and said, "There...all fixed." I realized then that I was all fixed and that instant of old pain was really a momentary shadow. I smiled and said, "Thanks, Vern... take care." And I left.
Then he said, "Sherrie" in a very quiet voice but to me it spoke in volumes.
I said hi and asked about his family--he's divorced with two sons who are in college now. Vern has always been a proud father and spoke for a few moments on how each of the guys were doing. I asked if his home got hit over the weekend--he's from the Charleston SC area and he said that he had a lot of trees down and his power was out for a few days. The reason he was in the area was to borrow some equipment from his uncle to move the trees from his yard.
What do you say when you really want to say what's on your mind? I met him at a Chamber of Commerce Affair. We clicked immediately and he gave me his card and asked that I call him. I had just broken up with Al and really didn't want a heavy relationship. I knew that this guy traveled around Ga, SC, NC and Va, so he wouldn't be at my door everyday. And we had fun.
But his problem was that he was a worrier about tomorrow. I had learned the hard way that tomorrow is never what we hope it will be. So why bother with worry--enjoy today. On our first date, after dinner we stopped at his apartment and we were laughing. Suddenly he said, "dammit, I knew this would happen. I knew I would like you too much. Now what am I going to do!!!!! I've got sons who are at that fun age--teenagers who are active and love golf and skiing like I do. Now, I'll be thinking of you when I'm with them. Dammit! Why do you have to be so cool? Why can't you be like the normal women around here? BORING! Fuck, Sherrie...what am I going to do?"
I remember staring at him, sitting on the floor across from me. I was sitting in a chair, legs crossed with the slit of my sundress showing more leg that I would have dared in church. I was swirling my glass of wine as I listened. His speech sent me into a Scorpio rage...I set the glass down, uncrossed my legs and leaned forward and said "See...that's the problem with people like you. You worry about tomorrow when its this moment that needs attention. Damn, I hear it all the time from my friends when they're on that first date with a fun guy...they're thinking what if we start dating steady, will my family like him, will I have to quit my job if we get married, where will we live--his house or mine... Would you please for just this night not think of what's going to happen when its over...would you please..." he interrupted me with a kiss. And for a while, he tried to do that... think of the now when we were together.
I know I had a heart to heal but I wasn't unrealistic in my expectations of him--he wasn't going to heal my heart--time would. For a while... we had fun. We laughed and sipped wine, talking about silly things. We embraced under candlelight ... and I could forget Al for a while...I could forget my loss of child and I could enjoy the arms of a man whose passions reveled mine.
But one day I got an email from him... his company was in trouble and his job wasn't secure, but he missed me and soon ...he would see me. But he didn't. A week later, his apartment was emptied and his email address (under his company name)... deleted.
As I stood in the here and now... I knew that too much time had passed. So I said "Well, take care" and turned to leave. He said, "Sherrie ...wait."
I turned wondering what he was going to say...was he going to explain his sudden silence and the fact he moved without a good-by in early 2000. Was he going to explain the years away...knowing that he came to Lumberton once a month and never bothered to at least say hi!!!
He reached over and tied a ribbon on the sleeve of my peasant blouse that was untied. I had planned on stopping by the bakery for coffee asking Miss Gail to tie it for me. His fingers trembled and I felt him brush my arm with them, as he tied the white ribbon. His familiarity was almost an ache, not one of regret but one of long forgotten pain.
When he finished, he surveyed his handiwork and said, "There...all fixed." I realized then that I was all fixed and that instant of old pain was really a momentary shadow. I smiled and said, "Thanks, Vern... take care." And I left.
dribbled by Sherrie @ 9/01/2004 01:46:00 PM
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